Drawing Doodles!

Some doodles that I draw whenever I'm bored! PS- I've edited it, it was kinda dark blah blah...

I just wanted an excuse to write another Blog post. Lately, I've this urge to write a lot, or maybe I'm just trying my best to not do my homework... hmmm yeah, let's just stick to the idea of me "having the urge" to write Blog post. Whenever I'm bored, I just start drawing. I mean, I took Art when I was in high school & since I'm in college, I don't really draw that much. I mean, the "doodles" that you see up there, I just typed "doodles" in Google search bar and I just started drawing. Everyone has their own style whenever they draw, I much of a realistic- type of drawer, so I'm not really good at drawing cartoon characters or Manga style art. I guess, you could say I have never learnt it!

OMG! I might try drawing these as well! AWESOME! 

I don't do Art (course) in my college, since I don't have time any more, I don't really draw that much. I love to draw! But it's really difficult to just spend time drawing, especially when I don't even know what to draw. Many people say that draw "what's in front of you" well... that's kind of boring for me. I mostly draw skulls and that "hard core" stuff that I search on the internet. I'm not into gaming, but I love playing Street Fighter a lot!!!!!!! I used to draw Ken, Ryu and I think I drew Chun Li as well... I don't really remember when I lost those drawing of mine. It was kinda cool.

MELLORINE~ Sanji is my Favourite Character

Lately, I have been avoiding all of my work,. You know those days where you come home, really freaking tired and all you want to do is eat and then sleep. Well, that's what I've been feeling lately. I have like -probably- five assignments to complete and I haven't even planed it out. I have no motivation at the moment! I usually, spend my time reading Manga and watching a lot of Anime. OMG!!! I can't just wait for One Piece's new episode! It's going to be EPIC! I also read the One Piece Manga, so I'm up-to-date with my One Piece. Other Anime that I watch are Beck, Peach Girl, Lovely Complex and I have watched so many, I have already forgotten their names! -__-

I think that is my little (not) post for today! Take Care! 

PS- sorry for any mistakes ;)

☻☺☻☺Peace x ☺☻☺☻

Shia Genocide Quetta

Stop Shia Genocide!

Shia Genocide- Quetta, Pakistan 

It seems like these two words “Shia” & “Genocide” has become one over few years. The mass murders, the loss of innocent lives... I may be young and less mature than your “typical” adult, but I do know what it feels like when someone special is snatched away from you by a force (mostly bomb blast) what are then left are their memories, their belongings and the feelings we had for them. One could say “We are all going to die one day” a bitter truth. But, no one will ever understand. Those who are gone will never come back, but those who are left behind, their family, their friends and all the loved ones... they’re the one who will have to suffer!

A Brother and Sister. The sister isn't alive any more, the brother is injured. Is this justice?

Imagine waking up the next day, calling their names, forgetting what just happened yesterday. The reality hits you hard. It pierces through your heart like a razor-sharp shiny blade. Unfortunately (or fortunately) I haven’t lost a family member, but I have lost a friend last year. No one will actually understand what I will go through day by day as the clock ticks by. On 21^st January I looked at some pictures and videos, I did cry. Looking at 10 years old, who was another victim, it makes me wonder why the innocent children are becoming a prey. No one would know but those filthy animals!

When will humanity wake up?

Imagine yourself, yes you. You are waiting for your daughter and your wife to come back from Karbala, you’re full of joy. You are happy; yet still, deep inside your heart you’re still praying for their safety, so that they will return in one piece. Alive. You want to see your 10 year old daughter and you want to hug her again. You have bought new toys for her; you promised her that once she is back you’ll spend more time with them. You were happy. You have bought flowers for them, so when they come, you’ll greet them with those beautiful red roses... but you didn’t know that those flowers will be used on their graves. That you’ll pluck them one by one while you hands tremble with anger and sadness; you heart twisting with sorrow, you will feel like someone is suffocating you! You will not see you daughter smile again. You won’t be able to see those dimpled cheeks, you won’t be able to see her grow up, you won’t be able to see her get her first job, you won’t be able to taste the sweets she’ll buy from her first salary... you won’t.

A weeping mother whose heart is scarred for life!

In Quetta, Pakistan, one could just look forward for their time. Waiting as the impatient clock ticks by. Tick-tock, Tick-tock. It’s not the fear of losing your own life; it’s the terror of losing your loved ones. “How will I live without that person?” but we all do. We all live with the sorrow. You know, I think a lot about the solution to these problems. What should I do to stop this? But I never get the answer. I think I never will. What can we do to stop this? What can we do? We have been protesting against it. With the coffins of loved ones beside us, in those freezing nights that sends chill down your spine. Those aggressive winds and angry rain blowing away and making it harder for us to show how much willpower we have. We did it last year in January, but yet again it continued... it will always continue right? The government doesn’t care! Hell if they did, people wouldn’t be dying this way! I am no politician and I don’t see myself becoming one in the future. Oh how I hate those scumbags! You will be here awhile if I start ranting about how much I hate them, so let’s just forget about those villains!

Basit Ali's grave...

He was snatched from Earth by those hideous monsters on 21^st January 2014. I can’t say much about him. His name was Basit Ali. I wish I could change the word “was” to “is” when talking about him, but I can’t. I followed his work through Facebook and let me tell you, he was a talented young man. Words can’t describe how much he did for his community and the Hazara people living in Quetta, Pakistan. Some of his friends describes him as a “gem” which is now lost. He made short documentaries and captured stunning pictures! No matter how much I write it won’t do him justice. He was indeed a “gem” in one-in-million!

Basit Ali- a photographer, who has become a photograph himself. His father holds his photograph in his hands (middle)

I have so much to say about the martyrs in Quetta, yet I can’t find the right words... or maybe it’s because I didn’t know them personally. Maybe because I have never talked to them in my entire life! But what I do know are the words their friends and family said about them. I am not much of a “follower” person; neither do I use Facebook to actually communicate with friends (who am I kidding -_-) but once I came upon this Facebook page where a certain person shared a lot of his magnificent photography. I have been following his work for quite some time now and I really love his work! 

Some of his work: - https://www.facebook.com/B.A.updates

Here you can see other posts related to Shia genocide: -

https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=5064631502120396747#editor/target=post;postID=1334707666941736413;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=15;src=postname

https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=5064631502120396747#editor/target=post;postID=634825820172547948;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=16;src=postname

https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=5064631502120396747#editor/target=post;postID=1463006965987164735;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=7;src=postname

Take care! 

PEACE NOT PIECES!

College Life

STRESS!

This is my first year of college. I started in September and its November now, so I have been doing pretty good to stay in College for three months. Lie. I don't really have good attendance, though I have 100% Punctuality! I guess I should be proud of that, isn't it? Well, to be honest, I would rather be an hour early than to be at least one minute late. That's just the way I'm. However, my teachers in College seem to only focus on the negative. They always moan about my attendance, I mean it's not like I'm doing it on purpose, sometimes you just got to miss a day or two to keep your brains intact to your bloody skull!

One of the main reason I hate college is waking up late! I set three alarms on my phone because when one of them rings, I just push the *Dismiss* button not the Snooze. I can't be bothered. I set three alarms so that on the third on I would wake up. Unluckily for me, my College is about an hour away from my home and God-forbid, if there is traffic; it's going to take me another 10-15 minutes to get to College. Sometimes, when I'm REALLY early at the bus stop, it only takes me 20 minutes to get to my college because most people at 7:15 don't go to work or use the buses that much. Am I making sense? Probably not. Sorry.

What makes things worse is that I got nothing to look forward to. I got no friends, I don't like my subjects that I have- oh I mean the teachers have chose for me, I sit alone at lunch, I think the Librarians hate me (once I was watching Anime and they caught me!) Oh, last but not least, I feel really stupid while sitting between typical "Smart" people. I think the list goes on, but I can't think of anything else to write (complain) about. I mean, don't get me wrong, if you're not *anti-social* like me, you'll love college life! It's all about you, your choices, your subjects and your assignments -Evil Laugh!-

Story of me Life!

In my opinion, a job is a job. If you're happy with it, then keep it. If not, try your best to find a new suitable job for yourself and leave the current one if you can. I mean, I know how hard it is to find a job when you might not have the qualification for it, but at least try your best in College or University. I'm now stuck with the courses that the teachers chose for me. I have to deal with it now. I will try my best to at least attend every lesson, and do the homework/assignments on time! I think everyone know their pros and cons when it comes to studying. When I was in school, I thought College would be a breeze for me. It would be easy. I was wrong. I was slapped by the brutal reality! I came to know that I "apparently” don’t know everything. I came to my senses because I was told that if you got an A in any of your GCSEs, it would be Equal to a D or E in A Level. It hit me really hard!

I thought I knew what I was going to be in the future. I thought I would probably write, or do some artist things. I don't know. Since I was little, I wanted to be a lawyer. I even played Lawyer-Lawyer with my cousins. I was one of the Lawyers and I had to win the case. It was a lot of fun! Oh the olden days... I wanted to act as well. So far, I wanted to be a Lawyer, an Actress, a Model (who walks on the ramp and takes cute pictures-My thought when I was little :P)  I wanted to be an Author, I wanted to be a director (or film maker) I wanted to be an artist. I guess everyone had dreams when they were younger, when we didn't know the harsh reality. The reality that not everyone makes it to the top, not everyone gets paid £3000 a week! 

Anyway, I think I will shut up now or should I say stop writing. I love writing; it takes my minds off from stupid idiotic things that I worry about for no apparent reason! Bye-Bye.

Xx Peace!

Getting really tired...

I don't remember the last time I posted a Blog. I don’t even know if people even read it or find it interesting. But I don't really mind as this Blog helps me to put my thoughts in front of me and see what exactly I have been thinking and what I'm going through.

Every day, I sit in the class, looking at the clock ticking, yet the time is staying still. Not moving forward. Everyone is happy, talking with their friends, yet I'm there alone. Not moving forward. Is this what life is about? My life? I sit still trying to pay attention to the teacher. I see his lips moving, but I can't hear him... I can't hear him due to the noises is my head. Those noises telling me that I'm a failure. I can't do anything. I am worthless. I sit there, no one notices me. I look at the clock again, I thought maybe at least fifteen minutes has passed, but no. Only two minutes has been passed since I last checked the clock.

Tick tock. Tick tock. I sit alone, not talking. I look around; everyone is surrounded by their friends. Yet I'm sitting here with only my thoughts. Not moving forward. I yawn. I look towards the window, it's raining. The gloomy weather impersonating me. Yet it is not to entertain others, it's just there like me. Will things change? I doubt it. Everyday waking up is a big task for me. Getting up to go to college, where I will follow the same cycle again. Doing work and going to my lessons. I'm getting really tired. My anxiety is back; my depression has taken over me. I'm not myself any more. I'm someone else.

My teacher says some people look up to me because I'm smart and do my work on time. When he said that, I laughed. Not because I was happy, but because I couldn't imagine it. Either way, it doesn't matter. I just don't want to be seen. I want to hide in the dark so that when the teacher asks us to discuss something, I could just curl in a ball and hide in a hole so that I don't have to socialise with others. Every day, I see myself drifting away from other people. It's as if I am not on Earth any more. It's as if I'm just skin and bones and flesh with no soul. 

I think a lot. I think what if I'm not here anymore. What if I'm dead? Will anyone think about me? Will anyone remember me? Each day passes by like a gush of wind trying to take me away from reality. Trying to blow me with himself and knocking me down on the ground, making me weep. I cry. I wish. I dream. Nothing happens. I thought going to college would mean I will get to start over. Start over... with new friends, make new memories, make changes. But no. It was all just a pathetic dream of mine. I'm getting really tired; I don't want to try any more. 

One of my teachers told me that if I fail at something, I should get motivated to do more so I can achieve higher! But no, it doesn't help at all. I try my best to look at the positive, but I just can't. 

All the motivation is gone down the drain. Every day I wish I could be a different person. Not shy, not anxious and not depressed! I want to be confident; I want to be out there experiencing all the things others are experiencing as well! I want to be brave and take risks. But no. I don't. I can't. You know why? It is because I'm a loser. I won't be able to do anything at all. I just sit in the class listening to the teacher, trying my best to fade in the background so that no one will notice me! 

Most of my teachers ask me why I missed a lesson twice in a row. Why didn't I attend their class and why didn't I do their homework. I just can't help it. I try my best to get up and just get on with my day. I try to make myself seem happy and positive. But I fail each time. I know that my teachers judge me; they think I have it easy. If they even for one day had to put themselves in my shoes, they would know how hard it is. How hard it is when You can't even speak up for yourself. How hard it is when You have not got any friends to turn to when you want to talk. How hard it is to be alone at lunch time, all by Yourself in the corner. They don't know anything, yet they still ask me "Why didn't you come to the lesson?" "Why have you been missing most your lessons?" 

Getting really tired... of Life!

Great GCSE Grades!

On the 22nd of August, my GCSE grades were out and I went to my school to receive them! I was so nervous and anxious that I felt like my whole body was on fire! I went there quite early, the time that was set was at 9 AM and I reached my school at 8:15 AM... I thought I was going to be the only one, but thank God I wasn't. There were three other people besides me, though I'm quite impressed that I was the only girl there! Go girl! Hahaha... anyway, I reached there and I signed in. My palms were sweating and I was so scared. The teachers took the forum and let us sign up some other forums in case if we want a remark.

The moment I entered the room to get my results, I felt like killing myself. That was the moment where it would be decided whether I would be doing the AS Levels that I have chosen, or BTEC! I want to do the AS Levels so I was really nervous if I had achieved the set grades that were the requirement for the AS Levels. The teacher handed me the letter in which my results were in. The brown envelop, I kept on staring at it, thinking should I open it or leave it till I reach home. I didn't open it, I said my goodbyes to the teachers and headed outside of the school... it was raining which made the situation worse, though it was good because if I cried, people will think it just rain on my freaking face!

I couldn't help it! I opened it and saw what I got in the results... needless to say I had done great in all of my subjects besides maths... What can I say! I fucking failed my maths exam! But the good part is that last year when I did the Maths exam I got a C which is a "pass" so this year when I re-took the Maths exams I got the D! So, luckily I can use the last year's C! YAY! I was really disappointed with my French... I thought I did well, but overall I got a freaking C! Oh well, at least I passed...

Now, everything is fine! I got into college and I’m starting this September... though I’m not really excited but I’m dreading it! Wish me luck!

Take care and Peace x

Volunteer Work! Hell YEAH!

Help others without expecting something back. Smile and make the world a better place!

I'm going to cut it really short. I found a Volunteering Work! So, if you don't know me (which mostly includes all of you) I have been looking for a Volunteer work for a looooong time! Recently, I found a website, where one can search for volunteering job. The options are really great and also it has varieties of place where you can volunteer. You know, I'm not the type of person who likes working. I'm super duper lazy! 

On the other hand, I love to work for other people. Not for myself. I feel like, me rather than sitting home all day long doing nothing, it's much better to go volunteer and help others! I mean, even if you're just going to a place where you'll be just cheering for others, why not? Go ahead because at the end you'll make someone's day and put a bright smile on their face. I really love to work with old people, disabled, youth; basically taking care of them and looking after them. It makes me really happy! I feel like one should always put themselves in their shoes and think how difficult life would be if no one took care of you and also if you were all alone and no one cared.

Stick together through rough times, it makes life a lot more easier!

I think it is really necessary that we all take some time out of our lives and help those who need us! I started this Volunteering work this Monday and I'm really happy with it. I already love it! Together as a community, everyone can bring a big difference in less fortunate’s' lives! Think about those people who have no choice being that way. Today it is them, who are in need but tomorrow it might be you.

I know many people think "Why work for free when you can get a better job?" I mean, what else would make you happy? You'd bring a smile on someone's face because you just sat there and talked to them just for 2 minutes! Trust me, they all appreciate it! Wouldn't it make you happy, seeing people have a new hope in their lives because you said something positive to them? Think about it, rather than just sitting at home, you could do these jobs for free and ask for nothing, but at the end, those smiles on those innocent faces will make you a lot happier than you were sitting at your home doing nothing at all...

Take care! Peace :)

Sketch Club (Quetta)

Now, I'm by no mean an artist. Though I know how to draw, but sometimes I've an "artist block" I just sit in the corner of my room thinking what to draw! I don't call myself an artist because... you know, I'm self taught and I know nothing about different types of art e.g. composition, portraits etc. I have kind of known something about them, but I can paint nor draw someone's portrait for the life of me! I love to draw! I mean, words can't explain how much I love drawing but one think I hate is when rather than sketching or drawing, I spend most of my time criticising myself!

Take your paint brush and with a stroke, paint your own world!

Lately, I have been inspired by so many artists. Not just famous artists, but those who are amateur in art filed. I have seen many works on Instagram and I follow a lot of them. Their works are mind blowing! One of the account on Instagram (Nawden) posts people's art work and they gain a lot of followers. If you by any chance have an Instagram account and would love to see amazing art work then make sure to follow "Nawden"

Since, I'm always on Facebook and I spend a lot of my time there, I search for different types of groups or pages which promotes different artists and their works. Now, I lived in Pakistan for many years. I lived somewhere in Quetta and in Quetta, there is a place called "Sketch Club" There, a teacher teaches his students art and how to draw or paint different things! Seeing that I was self taught, I'm thinking maybe all of this is in my blood and I was just born with this talent! Many people ask me "How can you draw like that?" I'm by no mean a teacher and my response is that "I just draw it" I know, it's not really a good response... but I don't know what else to say!

Title "Proxy War"

Medium: Oil on paper

Artist: S. Mohammad Ali

I love when there is a contrast of different colours! I don't really mind if an art piece hasn't got any meaning, especially if the artist is a beginner. It's true, you don't need to know how to paint, and the hardest question is what to paint! I really like the work above. As you can see, there is also politics reference as well and also you can see different flags including American flag. I know, art is to express what you feel, what you want to tell the world and it is also used to show the words that you can't speak!

Title "Still Life"

Medium: Markers on paper

Artist: Nadia Raza

I love still life! I think if you're a beginner and want to improve your art, you just get some objects and make a still life and draw from it. Still life will make you see how different lighting can have a bid effect on the way you draw or paint. I love when there is a texture into my drawing. My favourites to draw from still live are bottles, fruits and cosmetics. One of my favourite medium to draw with is pencil, I feel like I can draw many things with just one simple pencil! I mostly use 2b, 4b pencils... though I can't find a good quality ones!

Title "Still Life"

Medium: Pencil on paper

Artist: Mohammad Essa

One thing I would really like to improve is the proportion of my drawings! I just look at the still life and draw the outline without thinking, I think first I need to use different shapes such as squares, circles or any other shapes to make the body of the objects in proportion and then draw the outline of the still life. Always remember, you can erase your mistakes but remember that you don't press too hard while drawing because then it will be really difficult to erase. I see many people, while using coloured pencils; they don't really know how to blend different colours together. One of the people, she was so amazed when she found out that I actually use tissue to blend my colours together! So, remember whenever you use coloured pencils, apply little pressure and then blend it with a piece of tissue.

Title "Still Life"

Medium: Charcoal pencil on paper

Artist: Gulsoom

I'm in love with the art above! The first time I looked at it, I was really amazed and dazzled! I wondered how the person achieved such good contrast. I love the way it all blends together, though then there is a harsh black, which makes the art piece stand out even more! I like how in the background, the person has drawn a line, it creates the illusion of the object not floating in mid-air, which I have seen many people do. So many people don't focus on the background of their work, I have seen some people having great focus on the still life, yet when you see the background, there isn't any shading or anything! Though the artist above has beautifully achieved it! I like how the shadow is really dark, though I think it could be improved, if the artist adds little bit of greyness with the medium, it will blend in more properly. But, you know, I don't really know that much about art. 

Source: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Sketch-Club/118856201470254?fref=ts

Instagram Account who promotes artists: Nawden

Take care! Peace x (Keep Drawing!)